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The Magdalene

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Nashville band Dialup Ghost captured my whole heart last year. And what a year it was! From the heavenly highs of getting engaged, experiencing a religious awakening, and receiving a date for bottom surgery to the unfathomable lows: a relapse, the death of my grandfather (one year after the loss of my other grandfather), and the cataclysmic onset of the worst grief I have endured in this life… My inability to bear a child. Given this, it’s no surprise that Rhinestones, the opening track of May You Live Forever In Cowboy Heaven, grabbed me by the throat and brought me to tears. The atmosphere is so heavy it could crush you. The lyrics, hauntingly sharp and beautiful, craft a shining silver dagger to carve your skin as the tide churns and spins inside of you, rending and tearing and destroying.

Draw the line

Jigsaw the thyme Soak the needle

in the brine Wring it out into the grime

Ring the bell And Ring the chime Fall inside

Birth the Baby Say goodbye Throw yourself Into the tide

Valentine

Then, it’s over. And Shovel Song, the second track, is… different. To say the least. It’s an upbeat and uptempo indie bop positively overflowing with levity and joy. Complete with wobbly synth and jangly guitars, and Russ singing Please believe me that I love you with every ounce… Every fiber, every atom, every ember in the fire. I’m a lantern, you’re a lighter. Burning brighter.

I am a little ashamed to say that when I first heard this, I couldn’t stand it. I felt robbed. Rhinestones had promised me a death march and that’s what I God damned wanted from this record! But, with time, I’ve come to understand that this is not a record about misery. No, even at it’s darkest points, this is an album about love.

Grief is not sadness. Nor is it anger or frustration or longing. Grief is the pain of love without a beloved.

You owe it to yourself to listen to this album. These words I’ve spent on only the first two tracks, and it does not drop off from here.